Robert Schimmel

If You Buy This CD, I Can Get This Car

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Without his penis, comedian Robert Schimmel wouldn't know what to do with himself. Without his penis, Schimmel would have very little to say. Without his penis, Schimmel wouldn't have an act. Schimmel spends such a great part of his second album, If You Buy This CD I Can Get This Car, talking about his, and other guys', penises that it seems somewhat criminal that the member isn't mentioned somewhere in the title. Whether he's downloading porn (which inevitably leads to a giant picture of a penis sent to him via e-mail), going to the spa (which inevitably leads to wandering eyes checking out other units), or watching a movie (which inevitably leads to Demi Moore proposing oral sex), Schimmel can't help but bring the subject back to genitals. There are a couple of sobering pieces (regarding Schimmel's inability to get television work and his heart attack) that break from the norm on this occasionally funny, but ultimately one-trick (or would that be one-dick?), album.

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